Couple talking about money with honey

Talking Money with your Honey

Whether you are in a relationship or have money on your mind, WealthFD can help you start to realign your time, energy, and resources with the life you want to live.


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Money & Relationships

Communication is key. Understanding our relationship and our partner's relationships with money is key to having healthy relationships.

Finances are among the top of the list of sensitive subjects next to religion, politics, and family. These sensitive areas often overlap with finance, and impact our financial perceptions and decisions... and our spouses. When you mix this cocktail of topics together, finances are one of the leading causes of relationship issues, stress, and divorce.

Whether you are in a relationship or have money on your mind, WealthFD can help you start to realign your time, energy, and resources with the life you want to live.

Less Certainty, More Inquiry

As a species, we have evolved from instinct to inquiry. For centuries, these were effective jerk reactions that helped us survive.  Our primative thoughts - That is dangerous. He is weak. They are mean. - is now followed by "Why?"

Along the way, we have been able to separate ourselves from immediate dangers with time and space to make decisions.  The problem is we start to label complex people (including ourselves) with distilled descriptions which does no one justice. We all clearly bring different past experiences forward that we have interpreted in our own way. Sorting through the many shades of who and how we identify ourselves/others as well as our experiences requires a no-judgement zone. When it comes to topics as complex as people and how we look at what happens to us, we would do well approaching it with less certainty and more inquiry.

Dig Deep

A great starting point to sort through where we are today, whether you are with a partner or not, is to answer the following three questions. These thought-evoking questions, developed by George Kinder, are designed to help you to explore the "Why" in your relationship with money. 


Question 1: Design Your Life
I want you to imagine that you are financially secure, that you have enough money to take care of your needs, now and in the future. The question is, how would you live your life? What would you do with the money? Would you change anything? Let yourself go. Don’t hold back your dreams. Describe a life that is complete, that is richly yours.

Question 2: You Have Less Time
This time, you visit your doctor who tells you that you have five to ten years left to live. The good part is that you won’t ever feel sick. The bad news is that you will have no notice of the moment of your death. What will you do in the time you have remaining to live? Will you change your life, and how will you do it?

Question 3: Today’s the Day
This time, your doctor shocks you with the news that you have only one day left to live. Notice what feelings arise as you confront your very real mortality. Ask yourself: What dreams will be left unfulfilled? What do I wish I had finished or had been? What do I wish I had done? 


Sharing these answers with your spouse and revisiting them over time brings helps inquiry prevail over instinct in financial decision making. Now that you have written your answers down, share them with your partner or someone you trust.

How does this line up with how you are spending your energy, time, and resources today?

Continue the Conversation

Making sure the dialogue remains open about your position and beliefs around money is incredibly valuable in moving forward in a positive direction. Life happens and how we think and feel today won’t remain steady. It's important to prioritize and set aside time to explore whether you're spending your time, resources, and energy in line with what really matters to you.

As financial planners, these behaviors, beliefs, and feelings are the starting point of our process. We help identify positive and negative tendencies, and work with you to build a more productive and satisfying relationship with money. If you have not had these conversations and would like to explore ways that you may be able to bring your time, energy, and resources more in line with what matters most to you, contact us.